last night was an unofficial blogger convention and included 3 bloggers and 2 non-bloggers ... they were pretty much shunned for the entire evening. poseurs!
the plan was to meet at mr. and mrs.twink's house at some time ... uh ... times got a little confusing at one point. you see, i originally thought the planned gathering time was 5:30 ... mrs.twink actually said it was 6:00 and, well, jamie wanted to hit the gym before he came out and asked if we could meet at 6:30 ... well, i had a long day at work, got home, chilled out for a bit, showered all the sweaty filth from my body and left for their house. i forget stuff when i'm exhausted.
oh, i just have to tell you a quick story while i was on the way there. at the toll booths at the harbor tunnel, some idiot woman had stopped in the ez-pass lane and started holding up traffic. apparently she thought it was a cash lane but when she got up to the booth, she noticed no one inside to give money to. well, the horns started blaring; people started shouting. she throws the car in park and gets out. i smelled trouble brewing and was waiting for the crack! crack! crack! of automatic weaponry ... i happened to be in the next lane over. not thrilled about this and the possible outcomes of any confrontation:
man: go!
idiot woman: i don't have ez-pass! i thought this was a cash lane!
man: just fucking go through it!
idiot woman: didn't you hear me?!
man: they'll send you a ticket in the mail!
idiot woman: they'll send me a ticket? oh hell no! ::clutches 2 dollars in her hand and comes into my lane to pay the woman at my booth::
thankfully i paid just as she walked over and i was able to leave all that road-ragey drama behind. phew!
so ... while driving through the harbor tunnel a revelation occurred to me ... i think we're supposed to meet at 6:30 ... i look at my watch ... 5:10 pm. shit ... i'm over an hour early. as soon as i pass through the tunnel i call mrs.twink. i got her voicemail.
me: ::in a meek voice:: um, mrs.twink ... i, um ... i think i made a boo-boo. ::laughs a bit:: um ... call me as soon as you get this, please. thank you.
i get to their house, i park, i sit, i wait ... a few minutes later she calls back and i explain the situation.
me: i'm so sorry. i could have sworn the meeting time was 5:30 but when i got into the tunnel i started thinking that maybe it was 6:30.
mrs.twink: you're here now?
me: yes?
mrs.twink: oh. my. god. my house is so not clean. i was going to clean before everyone got here!
me: oh, i'll just wait outside in the stifling heat. i'll be fine.
mrs.twink: ::laughs:: you can come in, it's fine.
her and i watched "the world series of pop culture" for a while and i mastered the 'james bond' category. it was fun.
fast forward >>>
the mr. comes home ... theresa shows up ... jamie shows up ... we go to eat.
we walked to samos and mrs.twink puts her name down and while waiting to be seated this young asian kid comes in, about 18 or 19 ... college age kid ... and i'm laughing and i can't stop. mrs.twink thinks i am laughing because i look at him and then look at her and it's some sort of asian thing. not even close. without divulging too much detail, let's just say this kids pants were a little snug in the front. that's all i'm saying. a few minutes later he's joined by another guy and they give a quick furtive touch ... nervous because they are two gays guys in a crowded restaurant so i start talking about gay things, outing myself to them, perhaps to ease the tension they're feeling. i remember those days. strength in numbers!! it must have worked because shortly after, the one guy puts his arm around the kid and they hold each other for a few seconds. awww. now ... what's strange about all of this is the old man they apparently were there to meet. now, when you have a coupling like this there are generally only two conclusions: a) he's their sugar daddy, or b) he's the filmographer for the amateur porn they'll be performing later. it was a bit disturbing.
anyway ... dinner was fabulous ... the company was by far the best thing of the evening and i had an amazing time. i always do when i hang out with my friends and i absolutely love jamie, mrs.twink, the mr. and theresa. i especially like propositioning the mr. for a trade in "favors" for the borrowing of some of my ps2 games. whee. a girl's gotta get it any way she can!
i <3 you guys!
Showing posts with label greek. Show all posts
Showing posts with label greek. Show all posts
Thursday, August 9, 2007
Friday, July 20, 2007
last night we went greek ...
get your minds out of the gutter ... i didn't do anyone in the bum last night.
no, last night i had a dinner date with mrs.twink--which was planned earlier in the week--and we were going to 'samos,' a greek restaurant near where she and the mr. live. so the plan is to meet at 5 pm at her placeand then she and i would walk to the restaurant. so, i arrive at her place and the first thing i notice is the throng of people milling about outside on the sidewalk by where she lives, all of them in varying degrees of trashiness from the white trash to the greek mafia. luckily, her door is riiiiiiiight there and i can just step in and ... yay! air-conditioned haven!
ok, so, when i get there she's putting a load in the laundry and as soon as she's done we head out the door. remember those people i was talking about? yup, they're still there, though far fewer than before. as we begin walking you hear lots of noise ... people shouting, hammers hammering, music blaring, babies crying ... it's a scene out of a movie where you are walking down a dank alley in NYC, smoke billowing up from steam vents, and all you hear is background noise ... cars passing, music somewhere in the distance, babies crying, women getting beat, gunshots ...
so, anyway ... we pass this one house with the door standing wide open and there's a white trash dad who's yelling at his 3 or 4 year old daughter to "get back in this house!" as she stands in the doorway of her home wearing only her daddy's moth-eaten 'big johnson' t-shirt, her face covered in filth, and scratching herself in various locations on her body. ::averts eyes:: mrs.twink walks by all this without falter.
we pass all the relocated dundalk trash and make our way to the main street and she informs me she needs to get money from the atm. fine, get money ... i'm paying for dinner though, i think. so, as we're walking to the atm, our hands brush up against one another.
::awkward moment::
do i hold her hand? do i pretend it didn't happen? what do i do? she looks into my eyes and i into hers and our lips meet and we, wait ... no, that didn't happen ... so, she gets money out and we go to the restaurant.
we each ordered the vegekabob (but i got mine with chicken!) and a sampler that had tzatziki sauce (delicious!), some sort of pepper hummus, mushroom hummus, calamata olive paste (delicious!) and, i guess, salmon hummus? all of them were tasty--the tzatziki and olive being my favorite--except the salmon stuff. i took a small bite because i wanted to just try it at least. it was a pink cream-cheesy consistency laced with salmon roe and at first it had no flavor ... then suddenly i got hit in the face with a baseball bat of fishiness. it was gross. if i wasn't gay and classy i would have spit it out, but since i am, i swallowed. (mind ... gutters ... get out!) throughout dinner we talked about everything and we even gossipped a bit! ::gasp!:: i know ... a gay man and a woman gossiping?! it can't happen! say it isn't so! but yes, we did some gossiping. not about any of our friends, mind you ... a lot of it pertained to people we work with. it was fun.
after dinner i pull out my card to pay for the meal and mrs.twink stops me.
mrs.twink: i got this, geoff.
me: no, i'm going to pay.
mrs.twink: no, i want to get this.
me: i've got my card out already.
mrs.twink: hah! they only take cash.
me: you're lying.
mrs.twink: bet me.
me: ok, i bet you the cost of this meal.
i sat there with a smug look on my face because i knew i would win. i mean, who doesn't take credit cards at a restaurant. this was in the bag. the waitress arrives and i go to hand her my card.
waitress: oh, we only take cash. there's an atm back through the bathrooms.
score:
mrs.twink: 1
geoff: 0
after she paid we went back to her place where i was able to peruse her wedding album. oh. my. god. it. is. amazing. i loved it! it was very nicely done! while i was looking through it, the mr. came home from home depot and mrs.twink and i watched as he and marshall lugged heavy boxes of floor tiles into the house. (i would have offered to help, but heavy lifting? i don't think so.) the mr. started to sweat ... you're right jamie ... yum.
afterward we watched the tail end of "hey paula" and then mrs.twink introduced me to another show that i will be watching ... "scott baio is 45 ... and single" omg, talk about child star tragedy! he's pathetic and the show was like a train wreck ... i couldn't tear my eyes away. i enjoyed it very much and i shall set up my dvr to record it. thank you, mrs.twink.
so, in conclusion, dinner was great, the company was greater and the wedding album was fabulous! i had a great time, even when petey french kissed me, and i can't wait to do it again (w/o the doggie tongue action.) i adore mrs.twink, not only for her beauty and charm, but for her sadistic gossipy side and winning personality!
(author's note: mrs.twink's neighborhood really isn't all that bad. i'm just really good at finding the bad things about places and people and exploiting them. wonder gay powers ... activate!)
no, last night i had a dinner date with mrs.twink--which was planned earlier in the week--and we were going to 'samos,' a greek restaurant near where she and the mr. live. so the plan is to meet at 5 pm at her placeand then she and i would walk to the restaurant. so, i arrive at her place and the first thing i notice is the throng of people milling about outside on the sidewalk by where she lives, all of them in varying degrees of trashiness from the white trash to the greek mafia. luckily, her door is riiiiiiiight there and i can just step in and ... yay! air-conditioned haven!
ok, so, when i get there she's putting a load in the laundry and as soon as she's done we head out the door. remember those people i was talking about? yup, they're still there, though far fewer than before. as we begin walking you hear lots of noise ... people shouting, hammers hammering, music blaring, babies crying ... it's a scene out of a movie where you are walking down a dank alley in NYC, smoke billowing up from steam vents, and all you hear is background noise ... cars passing, music somewhere in the distance, babies crying, women getting beat, gunshots ...
so, anyway ... we pass this one house with the door standing wide open and there's a white trash dad who's yelling at his 3 or 4 year old daughter to "get back in this house!" as she stands in the doorway of her home wearing only her daddy's moth-eaten 'big johnson' t-shirt, her face covered in filth, and scratching herself in various locations on her body. ::averts eyes:: mrs.twink walks by all this without falter.
we pass all the relocated dundalk trash and make our way to the main street and she informs me she needs to get money from the atm. fine, get money ... i'm paying for dinner though, i think. so, as we're walking to the atm, our hands brush up against one another.
::awkward moment::
do i hold her hand? do i pretend it didn't happen? what do i do? she looks into my eyes and i into hers and our lips meet and we, wait ... no, that didn't happen ... so, she gets money out and we go to the restaurant.
we each ordered the vegekabob (but i got mine with chicken!) and a sampler that had tzatziki sauce (delicious!), some sort of pepper hummus, mushroom hummus, calamata olive paste (delicious!) and, i guess, salmon hummus? all of them were tasty--the tzatziki and olive being my favorite--except the salmon stuff. i took a small bite because i wanted to just try it at least. it was a pink cream-cheesy consistency laced with salmon roe and at first it had no flavor ... then suddenly i got hit in the face with a baseball bat of fishiness. it was gross. if i wasn't gay and classy i would have spit it out, but since i am, i swallowed. (mind ... gutters ... get out!) throughout dinner we talked about everything and we even gossipped a bit! ::gasp!:: i know ... a gay man and a woman gossiping?! it can't happen! say it isn't so! but yes, we did some gossiping. not about any of our friends, mind you ... a lot of it pertained to people we work with. it was fun.
after dinner i pull out my card to pay for the meal and mrs.twink stops me.
mrs.twink: i got this, geoff.
me: no, i'm going to pay.
mrs.twink: no, i want to get this.
me: i've got my card out already.
mrs.twink: hah! they only take cash.
me: you're lying.
mrs.twink: bet me.
me: ok, i bet you the cost of this meal.
i sat there with a smug look on my face because i knew i would win. i mean, who doesn't take credit cards at a restaurant. this was in the bag. the waitress arrives and i go to hand her my card.
waitress: oh, we only take cash. there's an atm back through the bathrooms.
score:
mrs.twink: 1
geoff: 0
after she paid we went back to her place where i was able to peruse her wedding album. oh. my. god. it. is. amazing. i loved it! it was very nicely done! while i was looking through it, the mr. came home from home depot and mrs.twink and i watched as he and marshall lugged heavy boxes of floor tiles into the house. (i would have offered to help, but heavy lifting? i don't think so.) the mr. started to sweat ... you're right jamie ... yum.
afterward we watched the tail end of "hey paula" and then mrs.twink introduced me to another show that i will be watching ... "scott baio is 45 ... and single" omg, talk about child star tragedy! he's pathetic and the show was like a train wreck ... i couldn't tear my eyes away. i enjoyed it very much and i shall set up my dvr to record it. thank you, mrs.twink.
so, in conclusion, dinner was great, the company was greater and the wedding album was fabulous! i had a great time, even when petey french kissed me, and i can't wait to do it again (w/o the doggie tongue action.) i adore mrs.twink, not only for her beauty and charm, but for her sadistic gossipy side and winning personality!
(author's note: mrs.twink's neighborhood really isn't all that bad. i'm just really good at finding the bad things about places and people and exploiting them. wonder gay powers ... activate!)
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