the wind that stole christmas ...

"you're a mean one, mr. wind ... you really like to bloooooow."

so, it's crazy windy outside today and it sucks driving a jeep in because it's very similar to steering a cardboard box in a hurricane. on my way to work i was swerving on the highway, narrowly avoiding mac trucks and other motorists, while also having to really stamp on the gas pedal to get princess madonna jeepington to cut through the wind and move forward at a faster clip than 45 mph. oy. i think i pissed off some people behind me.

anyway, so, though the wind is hard to drive in, i'm very delighted that it's this windy today and i'll tell you why. as per the title of this blog, on my travels through dundalk the wind decided to make me happy by causing severe havoc to every single inflatable christmas ornament that adorns the lovely town of dundalk. since wal*mart, k-mart and every other trashy store decided to sell those annoyingly white-trashy blow up dolls you place in your yard for the holidays, i've had an unhealthy aversion to them. i've contemplated slicing and dicing with a butcher knife on occasion ... that's how much i hate them. so, i had a smile the whole way while noticing these eyesores deflated or blown off kilter or simply exploded under the immense pressure. i love mother nature and her early december spring cleaning. time to take out the trash, mommy-nature!

the united states should seriously ban these things and gather them up and airdrop them in afghanistan as a form of mental warfare. take that, osama ... you've got pretty lawn ornaments.